Where did all the fun go? – Senior Living Insights

November 26, 2008

Where did all the fun go?

by Ruby MacDonald
Senior Living Insights

“In the true person, there is a child concealed who wants to come out and play – Nietzsche

When was the last time you had any fun?
It seems that kids are always having fun, no matter what they do, or where they are. They overflow with energy as though they are about to explode with it. But as they grow older, day by day, year by year, the ability to have fun seems to decrease and for some adults, to completely disappear from their lives. What happened to this all-important part of life?

Usually responsibility takes over. It makes us serious and so goal oriented that we forget what living really means.. Making a living – a necessity. A few enjoy the process while many others have no options but to work at jobs they do not enjoy In either case, we still need to make time to have fun.

Fun serves many purposes. For kids, it teaches social and new skills, confidence, and creates laughter. It is a carefree time. Adults need play so that they can relax, enjoy interaction with people and expand their horizons. Everyone needs laughter.

Many people think they are playing when they are competing. When in fact they are creating stress for themselves. So playing to win doesn’t quality as fun. True playing doesn’t involve trying to impress or please other people; it isn’t measured by results, production or external rewards. True fun is pure enjoyment that allows us to be totally present in the moment, and it includes moments of laughter, a good belly laugh. Here are a few quotes to ponder:
Laugh longer – live louder” - “The purpose of fun is to have it.” - “In the beginning, it was fun.” “A playful path is the shortest road to happiness.” And one I especially like is: “For every Way there’s a Way of following that Way that’s fun.” Try the following to add more spice to your life.

Think of play as enjoying the simple things that give you instant emotional rewards.
Try new things to push your limits that are fun.
Allow your imagination to flow freely
Be anything and everything you dream of such as a ballerina, an artist, etc. if only for a day or in your imagination
Engage with nature and its creatures
Be silly, playful, spontaneous and curious
Go to the senior center and sign up for a fun trip
Participate in a new activity that you haven’t tried before right where you live.
Try painting if you’ve always wanted to be an artist.- you don’t have to paint a perfect picture, all that is required is that you have fun and enjoy the process.
Read something you can completely get lost in.
Laugh – do something that makes you laugh.
Listen to music
Plant something or buy a new plant to enjoy.
Notice new things as you walk down the same streets
Watch a funny movie
And lastly, keep a daily journal and before retiring list one thing for which you are grateful; one way you had fun and how many times you laughed..

“You can’t ever just sit back and let things happen. Never give in…Never, never think about your age, and keep occupied until the end.” – Mary Martin

Senior Living Insights By Ruby MacDonald

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SEAS THE DAY WITH GRATITUDE – Senior Living Insights

November 25, 2008

SEAS THE DAY WITH GRATITUDE - Senior Living Insights

“A day without gratitude is like a day without sunshine.”

Today the sky is a lovely cobalt blue, a welcome change from the rains. Fluffy white clouds tease the sun. The horizon is a less vivid color as it dips down into the Coral Sea here on the north eastern coast of Australia. I’m sitting on the deck of a catamaran watching the dark blue waves that barely hint at white caps. We’re cruising along at ten knots and all is well. Life is good. We utter a silent prayer of gratitude.

Gratitude! Such a powerful word. This word is a potent tool for life when we remember to focus on it. Oh, it’s easy to focus on gratitude on a perfect day such as this one when my mind is peaceful; I’m comfortable, healthy and well fed.

But what about those days when a persistent wind whips our sails or the seas are so choppy it’s difficult to find our sea legs – or the engines fail to fire up in the face of an approaching cyclone?

Even on land everyone has days like those. They seem to multiply as we grow into being more “seasoned adults.” But when we shift our focus from gratitude for all that’s right about our lives and focus on all that is not so right, often the sea of life becomes too rough to handle. It is then that thoughts of gratitude seem to have sunk to the bottom of the sea and the desire to be thankful for what fate has handed us is locked tight in Davey’s locker.

The sixty four dollar question then, is, “How can I focus on the positive things in my life when it feels as though I’ve drowned in my own problems?” Changing our thought pattern is simple but not easy—since the way we think is a habit and habits are not easy to break. But the good news is that since thoughts are a habit, we can start a new habit—a new way of thinking. Use the methods outlined below, and stick with it for the entire month. These new habits will enrich your life and help develop an attitude of gratitude.

The first thought of negativity that sneaks into your mind must be speared as soon as possible so it doesn’t spread its tentacles like an octopus and render you helpless. A thought, (what you think ) is one of the most powerful, invisible, weapons (tools) in the world. Doubt me? Think about how Hitler’s powerful thoughts/words contaminated the world. On the positive side, Dr. Norman Vincent Peale influenced thousands, perhaps millions of people including me, with his book, The Power of Positive Thinking. It all started with a thought. Dr. Wayne Dyer, a modern day motivational teacher of wisdom, says that we become what we think about all day long, and the Bible warned us to be careful what we ask for (it is a thought first). A thought alone is as powerful as asking for something with words. Think of it as a seed. As soon as energy is given to any thought it sprouts, and like a pesky weed, will spread its roots and grow.
Take charge of your thoughts and words. Remember, thoughts are powerful tools and you are in control of them. Many us allow our thoughts to sail through our minds with no controls. Yet we surely wouldn’t get into a boat that had no captain, engine (sails), no rudder, or wheel, and let the sea joust us about and be at the mercy of the seas Yet that is exactly what many of us do with our lives when we don’t control our thoughts.
Have your ammunition at hand. We must have constructive thoughts ready to push out and replace the first negative/destructive thoughts that enter.. Usually negative thoughts stir in the morning as soon as we wake up. Old habits have been lying beside us all night and they get up with us. It’s up to us to usher them out or invite them to stay. There are several kinds of ammunition that will replace those destructive thoughts while we break the old thought-patterns:
1. Bible verses to read or saying those you have memorized
2. Being in a state of gratitude first thing in the morning and before sleeping
3. Prayers of affirmation and gratitude
4. Reading inspirational magazines and books to keep your mind focused on the positive side of life.
5. Listening to tapes, CDs of inspirational speakers
6. Making a nightly list of at least five things for which you are grateful each day.
7. Taking a quiet time each day to consciously focus on gratitude.
8. Hanging out with positive people. “You gotta accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative,” to quote from an old song.

BE GRATEFUL. No matter what the day brings, work at being grateful about the many things that are still good in your life. Write “GRATITUDE” on your mirror or paper to constantly remind you until GRATITUDE becomes an automatic habit.

“Serving your mind a dose of gratitude is like a multivitamin for your body.”

Senior Living Insights

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Is there really a secret to the secret or is the secret no secret at all? Senior Living Insights

November 21, 2008

empowered living – senior Living Insights

Is there really a secret to the secret or is the secret no secret at all?

By Ruby MacDonald

“A person who sets his/her mind on the dark side of life, who lives over and over the misfortunes and disappointments of the past, prays for similar misfortunes and disappointments in the future. If you will see nothing but ill luck in the future, you are praying for such ill luck and will surely get it.” – Prentice Mulford

This is the last in a series of three regarding this subject. As I’ve talked with various retiree’s about using this technique for changing our lives and getting what we really want, I am asked the same question many times: “But don’t we have to take responsibility and do something besides ask, believe, and wait for it to come to us?”

The answer is YES, you must participate. It takes more than asking and waiting. You must participate with your whole mind, body and soul. Don’t expect the universe to dump a million silver dollars in your lap simply because you asked. If it is realistic for YOU, it may come after you’ve asked, if you’ve made an effort to enter all the doors of opportunity that the asking has provided for you.

One of the other questions I’m asked is about age. Many people think that their age is a barrier to using these principles, but let me assure you that there is no age limit – it is only each of us who set those limits. So now let’s go to work. I’ll explain how to use the principles in the book, The Secret, and in other motivational wisdom books such as those written by Dr. Wayne Dyer, Dr. Deepak Chopra, Carolyn Myss, and many others. Basically, only the words are different, the message is the same. The message is about THE LAW OF ATTRACTION – OR

— I attract what I think about all day long — Senior Living Insights

I know a man who is always pinching pennies, is always saying he can’t afford to do what his peers are doing, is always worried about where the next check is coming from – and when he speaks, he mostly comes from a negative place. I ATTRACT WHAT I THINK ABOUT –. Yes, you got it. As you know, when you come from a negative place, the mind only hears negativity and works to produce more of what “we think about,” even though we may say we don’t like the cards we’ve been dealt. But in reality we are creating that negative environment by our thoughts and words. Do you remember hearing, “Change yourself and you change your universe?”

We can certainly apply the law of attraction to health. If we focus on our aches and pains (and who amongst us doesn’t have any?) our pains will increase, and we will talk more about them and they will get even worse. It’s not to say that we should ignore whatever is going on in our bodies; we need to take care of the problems with medication, exercise or whatever has been suggested or prescribed, but we don’t need to tell the world about it repeatedly, and keep complaining about the pain because that serves to reinforce the illness and produce more. Focusing on something positive opens the door to joy and happiness even though the pain is a companion.

Owen Waters, author of “The Shift: The revolution in human consciousness,” says “The state of regular, conscious thinking often contains self-limiting filters like skepticism, fears, or a lack of self-esteem.” Sometimes we must work hard to break those habits of thought and change them to a positive way of looking at life, no matter what our circumstances may be. We may have pain or handicaps for the rest of our lives, but we must find some way to see life in a positive way so that we can live with joy instead of becoming bitter about life and hard to live with.

Abraham/Hicks say, “ You can get anywhere you want to be from wherever you now are. There is no place that you are that is too far from where you want to be. (There are no exceptions.) Just go there little by little, as you deliberately feel a little better now, and little better now. “

In reality, there are no secrets in life – just common sense. The laws of the universe apply. Plant weeds and weeds will grow. Plant beautiful flowers and you’ll have a joyful burst of color. I’d rather attract a bouquet of fragrant carnations, wouldn’t you?

“I AM WHAT I THINK ABOUT ALL DAY LONG“

Senior Living Insights

http://www.seniorlivingsolutions.com

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WHERE THERE IS DESPAIR LET THERE BE HOPE – Senior Living Insight

November 20, 2008

WHERE THERE IS DESPAIR LET THERE BE HOPE St Francis/Assisi Aug 06

By Ruby MacDonald

Several times I have related that a thought is the first step in creating both the healthy and unhealthy emotions we live with. It takes but a simple persistent negative thought to lead to despair. Dr. Wayne Dyer, author of There’s a Spiritual Solution to Every Problem, says, “Despair is an attitude, experienced in the mind. It is a way of looking at a life situation and feeling hopeless.” He adds that there actually is no despair in the world. You cannot bring home a bucket full of despair; there are only people thinking despairing thoughts. “Despair itself is a mental process that sizes up and views a situation as awful,” says Dr. Dyer. Once we see despair as a mental attitude, we can remedy it by beginning the process of bringing the hope that will dissolve the attitude of suffering. Hope is also a thought. Hope is a vision. Despair is darkness. Hope is light. Hope is on the higher end of the energy scale that brings health and happiness; despair and gloom is on the lower end of the energy scale that makes us vulnerable to illness and depression. It clouds our thinking. We cannot see in the darkness.

In order to cope with despair, we must learn to stand back and in affect, detach ourselves from what is happening, or take on the attitude of the observer so that you can “look in and see the despair” as though you are another person seeing you. This detachment gives us the power to change our thought pattern to create hope and a higher level of energy. The higher the level of energy we can create, the easier it is to find the spiritual solution to our problems since God is peace, hope and love.

As we grow older, often the optimism we held about life turns to despair for many reasons. Loneliness, illness, grief, and more, can overwhelm us. Gloom and despair may come from our attachment to the feelings that life is unfair, or we blame others for our sorrows, or we feel we are not understood. These equate to self-pity and self-loathing. “Despair allows the sufferer to suffer in comfort”, says Dr. Dyer. Often we despair over what or who is missing in our lives. We have been conditioned to think, “I am what I have, what I do, and what others think of me.” Yet if we listen, God’s voice will whisper that none of these things bring happiness. If we listen we may even hear Him say, “I am your only source of peace. I am the spiritual solution to all your problems related to attachments.”
To bring light to darkness, practice doing the following every day: 1) Refuse to dwell on thoughts about the problems in your life but rather on all there is to be grateful for even if it is one tiny thing. In time your list of blessings will become more evident. 2) Practice being an appreciator of beauty; strive to see the beauty in everyone and everything. 3) Read about those who have overcome darkness in their lives such as Helen Keller & Christopher Reeves. 4) Send out thoughts of love to those around you and immediately replace thoughts of resentment/disturbance/criticalness, with love. 5) Keep your thoughts centered on light and what you want, rather than on dark and what you don’t want; visualize your body as well and whole, do not reinforce any illness by thinking about it or discussing it habitually. 6) Go outside into the day light when thoughts of darkness overtake you since light dissolves darkness. 7) Practice purification by drinking pure water, eating pure foods, and keeping your thoughts pure. Repeat to yourself daily the following:
AS I THINK
SO SHALL I BE

Senior Living Insights by Ruby MacDonald

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The Art of Ruby MacDonald and The Secret To Happiness

November 18, 2008

The Artwork of Ruby MacDonald

Ruby MacDonald’s Art
GRATITUDE

HAPPINESS

“The door to a balanced success opens widest on the hinges of hope and encouragement.” – Zig Ziglar

In December, our family was involved in the Manos de Amor shelter in Bucerias, Nayarit. We helped to collect money to buy much needed clothing plus toys for a few of what, in Mexico, are sometimes referred to as “children of the dump.” There are many reasons why children are left, such as one or both parents being in prison, abandonment or mother has died, domestic violence and abuse, alcohol-drug abuse, neglect, poverty, divorce/separation, emigration to the USA, and more. You name it and it will probably apply to these children.

There are twelve children in this particular temporary shelter, which is run mostly by volunteer help. In the near future, the construction of the Manos de Amor (Hands of Love) Orphanage will begin, thanks to the efforts of a few American expatriates and Mexican women. These tireless women have and still hold a myriad of benefits to raise the money for this building. They donate much time, effort and hard work, plus keep an enduring attitude of enthusiasm and determination. The ages of the twelve children range from 3 years up to ten. An invalid wheelchair bound boy, 10, should be in an institution where he can be properly cared for; he is a drug child who cries out for attention. Three blond siblings, have an American mother and a Mexican father. A beautiful curly haired girl, three, has dark eyes that shine with happiness even though she is one of those who has been recently dumped. It is indeed sad and tears your heart out. Yet if you saw most of these children on the street, playing like other children, you’d see smiles and happiness on their faces. And we have to ask, How is this so? Are they born with an attitude of gratitude towards life that keeps them smiling?”

We have visited Mexico many times throughout the years as we do now, and my observation is that, generally, not only the children but also the adults , seem like happy people. Their eyes shine, their smiles are wide, their laughter robust and from the heart, as they toil in the hot sun to earn a meager living. Perhaps they sometimes gripe and complain but I have not gotten that impression while I am here. They seem to live in an attitude of gratitude rather than feel sorry for themselves or resent the cards they have been dealt.

By contrast, we in America, for the most part, have so much more for which we could live in an attitude of gratitude yet many of us grumble and complain about minuscule things daily. Or we focus on the not so great part of our lives instead of elevating the greatest part. Our focus and attitude tilt out of balance. We lack an attitude of gratitude for all that is right in our lives. And even when all is not so great, if we take time to sort it out, we will still find much that is right. How we think is habit and effects our health and shapes our lives, so again, as in the past, I suggest the following to make the year 2007 bright and joyful in the midst of our unique circumstances.

Keep a gratitude journal; write at least 5 things every day for which you are grateful.
Do an attitude check on yourself every morning, noon and night.
Never go to sleep with negativity on your mind. If you can’t shake it, pray or meditate and give thanks to your Higher Power for something that is right in your life.
Remember to forgive people. Resentments equal negative attitudes and ill health.
Help someone everyday, especially new residents who need to feel welcome.

“A healthy tree does not bear bad fruit; nor does a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree is known by the fruit it bears.” Or in my words, “we become what we think about all day long.”

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“You gotta live every day like it’s your last” -Frank Sinatra – Senior Living Insights

November 17, 2008

“You gotta live every day like it’s your last because one day you’ll be right.” Frank Sinatra

While Tom and I, Tim and Suz and friends were moored off the New Zealand coast one evening, listening to my all time favorite, Frank Sinatra singing many of his popular hits, we made a point of listening carefully to the lyrics. We found that they contained some pretty wonderful messages for our lives that triggered a lively discussion. Ole Blue Eyes may be gone but his spirit certainly is alive in our daily lives through his music. As you read these words, think about them and what they either do or can mean to you personally.

IF YOU’RE YOUNG AT HEART
Fairy tales can come true
It can happen to you
If you’re young at heart
For its hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind
If you’re young at heart

You can go to extremes with impossible schemes
You can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams
And life gets more exciting with each passing day
And love is either in your heart or on its way

Don’t you know that it’s worth every treasure on earth
To be young at heart
For as rich as you are its much better by far
To be young at heart

And if you should survive to 105
Look at all you’ll derive out of being alive
Then here is the best part
You have a head start
If you are among the very young at heart. – (Music:Joseph Myrow, Lyrics: Mack Gordon 1946)

We asked everyone aboard what they thought it meant to be “young at heart” and thus this month’s column was born.

First of all, let’s begin by discussing what it means when we don’t stay young at heart: All too often we focus on the number of years we’ve lived and give the number permission to dominate our lives, either by mimicking aging role models, or living by preconceived ideas about aging that society has handed to us. It’s easy to forget that times change and today we are far younger than our parents were in their aging years. If we do focus on the number of years we’ve lived, too often we use our age as an excuse to get stuck in one time zone and live in the past. Or we think we’re much too old to do certain things such as dressing more youthfully, trying a new hair style and since we’re simply afraid to try new things, we limit/deprive ourselves of being young at heart. We stop dreaming. We get stuck. Fairy tales fade away.

“For its hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind, If you’re young at heart”

On the other hand, those who remain young at heart seldom use their age as an excuse. If anything, they use their age as a springboard because they know it’s now or never and they’d better get with the program if they’re going to have fairy tales come true. They live each day to the fullest—as though it’s the last, as ole Blue Eyes said.

Those who are young at heart are not afraid to risk doing something new and different, whether it is a new card game, traveling to an unfamiliar place, or ordering something new on the menu. Or perhaps it’s a new trendy hairstyle, or daring to have our hair colored (men and women), or wearing a bright new color that makes us look alive and ready to explore life.

To be young at heart is to be limitless – that is, there are no limits set, no boundaries to which you will not cross because of fear, or risk, or age.

The young at heart feel ageless. They don’t look in the mirror and concentrate on the road map that has planted itself on their faces. They are proud of their wrinkles, knowing they’ve worked darned hard to earn them. Instead they look in the mirror and see a face that has sparkling eyes, smile lines, and a mind filled with positive attitudes that nourish a sense of enduring adventure. They still buy green bananas.

The young at heart are timeless. They don’t make plans according to the number of years they’ve lived. Their time-line is open. They can bend. They are open-ended to new ideas as the times change, and know that change is what life on this planet is all about.

The young at heart aren’t afraid to dream. They set realistic goals and watch them come true, one at a time. They know that they must have something to look forward to each day, something that is filled with hope for tomorrow. It may be as small as knitting a scarf for someone, or as large as taking a trip to a place they’ve always wanted to see on the other side of the world, or in the next town, or in the garden. There are no size restrictions to dreams and we can have any kind and as many as we want. So what are you waiting for?

Fairy tales can come true. It can happen to you – if you’re young at heart.

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GOOD NEWS! The New Life Of Senior Assisted Living San Francisco, CA Discovers GOOD NEWS!

November 15, 2008

Being fet up with all the bad news reported in the news lately, I decided to go on the web today and type “Good News” into google and lo and behold I found a whole bunch of it. I started ‘The New Life’ out today by saying, “I have some good news for you today!” I could feel their emmediate inner glow of excitement. I sat down and started reading a headline, “Volunteer Greeters Offer Hugs, Applause For Troops”. Basically there is a group out there that goes to Bangor International Airforce Base every time a plane of troops come home from their tours of duty in Iraq, to give applause and handshakes. How beautiful we all reacted. This set the tone for a marvelous dicussion about giving yourself over to a cause greater than one’s self. Residents shared their stories about what they have passionately given time and money towards. Resident, Jenny Murphy shared how she started the Pleasant Hill Senior Community Center many years ago and how over the years of enthusiastically giving to her vision, today it has become a thriving center where seniors go to have fun, while engaging with like-minded people.

The New Life always ends singing, “Oh what a beautiful morning….”

Please join us! Saturdays at 9:45 at the Chateau Pleasant Hill

2770 Pleasant Hill Rd
Pleasant Hill, Ca 94523
(877) 468-9773

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The New Life Of Senior Assisted Living San Francisco, CA

November 15, 2008

The New Life is a group of Senior Residents at The Chateau of Pleasant Hill who gather every Saturday morning at 9:45 to share stories, insights and passions in order to get to know each other better.”This is a great way to really transition easily and gracefully into a retirement community such as this.”, say’s resident Nancy Tranchell, “It really helps the transition when you really get to know people and that’s exactly what we do here through sharing stories from our past.”

The New Life Group is lead by Michael J MacDonald and everyone is welcome to join.

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Every Day Like It’s Your Last! Senior Living San Francisco

November 14, 2008

Every Day Like It’s Your Last! Senior Living San Francisco

By: Ruby MacDonald