What Are You Creating Right Now? – Assisted Living Insights

January 31, 2009

WHAT ARE YOU CREATING RIGHT NOW?

“You create your thoughts, your thoughts create your intentions, and your intentions create your reality.”
Dr. Wayne Dyer

By Ruby MacDonald

For years I’ve been fascination by the human brain and its vast potential. First from a psychological v.p. & now from a spiritual view point, not in the religious sense, but in the more mystical/creative realm. I’m convinced that our ability to create begins in our brain; God created us to create. Creation begins with one tiny thought. It may come from within you, or someone else, and once you accept it as yours and begin to think about it, you’ve started the process of creation. The more emotion you have with that thought the more powerful is your ability to attract what you want. Once your brain gets the go-ahead from you, it springs into action and clicks in to perform your command perfectly. That is why it’s extremely important to be aware of your own thoughts and the words you say. Your brain doesn’t sort out positive from the negative; it waits for your command. It simply acts on your thought.
I’ve spent half of my life learning about and teaching how powerful the brain is and how important our thoughts are. When I was a kid I used to hear my father speak of the dreaded “evil eye” in his native Sicily. I snickered and thought it was a bunch of nonsense even though the stories made the hair on the back of my neck stand at attention. I’ve since learned about the power of the mind and believe that if I told you that something terrible was going to happen to you, and you believed me, YOU could make it happen simply by the power/energy/focus you give it; your own mind would work to carry out whatever you feared.
I believe that the power of the mind can also make us ill, or worse. One of my favorite examples of the power of suggestion is this one: During the winter months we are ambushed with news that the flu is epidemic. We’re sure we can’t escape it so we begin to worry. If we get the sniffles we’re certain we’ve got something that’s going around. We reinforce our fear by thinking that we have a cold, and we tell everyone who will listen. (It may have only been hay fever.) Next, we think we will be really sick, probably run a fever and by the end of the week we are certain we will be in bed vomiting or worse. Well, guess what? I believe that since we’ve programmed ourselves for a week full of illness— that is exactly what we will get. We’ve created it with our powerful minds. The brain has taken instructions and followed them exactly as we’ve prescribed it.
Arthritis is one of my pet peeves. If we break or sprain something doctors are quick to say arthritis will set in. My doc knows “I don’t do arthritis.” She snickers. I refer to it as the nasty “A” word. People take possession of arthritis as soon as they think they have it. I.E.: A younger friend’s fingers began aching; her mother had arthritis so she was certain she’d inherited it. (How many of us do that?) She took possession of it and referred to it as “my arthritis.” We had a little discussion and it “amazingly” disappeared! I believe strongly that it isn’t necessary to talk about any symptom or medical sentence your doctor has decreed for you. To acknowledge it is to reinforce it. Taking possession of it and making it yours only gives it permission to proceed. Once we start talking about it to others, it grabs that energy/power to accelerate. That energy can better be used to create positive thoughts of healing for yourself. Get the needed treatment. Then if you must tell someone, say, “I’m catching healing,” and let it go. You can tell those symptoms that they are not welcome in your body and to flee. You must believe it, however, and you must be persistent, for the habit of illness is like a child who pushes the envelope to see if you mean business.. It’s up to you to stick in there and show the old habit who is boss. It takes a while to break old habits and patterns, so don’t expect the symptoms to disappear quickly. Like a spoiled child who is suddenly being disciplined, there will be rebellion within. Remember to put lots of emotion behind your thoughts of healing and be persistent.
We are never too old or too sick or too busy, to have creative minds. We “create” every second of every day and it is either negative or positive —depleting energy or increasing energy.
We deplete our energy if we focus on a negative situation, be it our own or someone else’s. Our energy level plummets and a cloud of doom and gloom cloaks us. When we change our thought pattern to those that are sunny, energy levels are elevated to a healthier state; we are less vulnerable to illness & to attracting negative thinking people into our lives.. Thoughts are contagious. Choose wisely.

“As you cannot have a sweet and wholesome abode unless you admit the air and sunshine freely into your rooms, so a strong body and a bright, happy, or serene countenance can only result from the free admittance into the mind of thoughts of joy and goodwill and serenity.” — James Allen 1864-1912 (note the dates—this is not “new age” enlightenment, but time-proven.)

The Parable of the Trapeze – Senior Living Insights

January 21, 2009

Turning the Fear of Transformation into the Transformation of Fear
by Danaan Parry

Sometimes I feel that my life is a series of trapeze swings. I’m either
hanging on to a trapeze bar swinging along or, for a few moments in my
life, I’m hurtling across space in between trapeze bars.

Most of the time, I spend my life hanging on for dear life to my
trapeze-bar-of-the-moment. It carries me along at a certain steady rate of
swing and I have the feeling that I’m in control of my life.

I know most of the right questions and even some of the answers.

But every once in a while as I’m merrily (or even not-so-merrily) swinging
along, I look out ahead of me into the distance and what do I see? I see
another trapeze bar swinging toward me. It’s empty and I know, in that
place in me that knows, that this new trapeze bar has my name on it. It is
my next step, my growth, my aliveness coming to get me. In my heart of
hearts I know that, for me to grow, I must release my grip on this
present, well-known bar and move to the new one.

Each time it happens to me I hope (no, I pray) that I won’t have to let go
of my old bar completely before I grab the new one. But in my knowing
place, I know that I must totally release my grasp on my old bar and, for
some moment in time, I must hurtle across space before I can grab onto the
new bar.

Each time, I am filled with terror. It doesn’t matter that in all my
previous hurtles across the void of unknowing I have always made it. I am
each time afraid that I will miss, that I will be crushed on unseen rocks
in the bottomless chasm between bars. I do it anyway. Perhaps this is the
essence of what the mystics call the faith experience. No guarantees, no
net, no insurance policy, but you do it anyway because somehow to keep
hanging on to that old bar is no longer on the list of alternatives. So,
for an eternity that can last a microsecond or a thousand lifetimes, I
soar across the dark void of “the past is gone, the future is not yet
here.”

It’s called “transition.” I have come to believe that this transition is
the only place that real change occurs. I mean real change, not the
pseudo-change that only lasts until the next time my old buttons get
punched.

I have noticed that, in our culture, this transition zone is looked upon
as a “no-thing,” a noplace between places. Sure, the old trapeze bar was
real, and that new one coming towards me, I hope that’s real, too. But the
void in between? Is that just a scary, confusing, disorienting nowhere
that must be gotten through as fast and as unconsciously as possible?

NO! What a wasted opportunity that would be. I have a sneaking suspicion
that the transition zone is the only real thing and the bars are illusions
we dream up to avoid the void where the real change, the real growth,
occurs for us. Whether or not my hunch is true, it remains that the
transition zones in our lives are incredibly rich places. They should be
honored, even savored. Yes, with all the pain and fear and feelings of
being out of control that can (but not necessarily) accompany transitions,
they are still the most alive, most growth-filled, passionate, expansive
moments in our lives.

We cannot discover new oceans unless we have the courage to lose
sight of the shore. Anonymous

So, transformation of fear may have nothing to do with making fear go
away, but rather with giving ourselves permission to “hang out” in the
transition between trapezes. Transforming our need to grab that new bar,
any bar, is allowing ourselves to dwell in the only place where change
really happens. It can be terrifying. It can also be enlightening in the
true sense of the word. Hurtling through the void, we just may learn how
to fly.

Hand Me Down Rules – Senior Living Insights

January 13, 2009

HAND ME DOWN RULES

Emotional rules inherited without protest

By Ruby MacDonald – Senior Living Insights

Sometimes adult children look forward to the time when they will receive an inheritance, if they are fortunate enough to have wealthy parents or relatives. However, each of us has already received an inheritance such as all of the good traits we’ve been taught unhealthy habits, emotional traits, and unhealthy ways of handling unpleasant events in our lives. Many of us have embraced some or all of the emotional rules that we inherited without even a whimper of a protest even though they do not serve us well.

Most of us have lived with hand-me-down rules all of our lives. Some of them were passed on ever so innocently, from our parents. Some are so deeply ingrained that we haven’t bothered to question their validity. I like to use the old story of the ham that you may have heard a dozen times but I’ll personalize it to make it more interesting. Years ago when one of my young daughters saw me cutting off the ends of the ham before I baked it, she wanted to know why I did that. My reply was because my mother had. But my young inquisitive child wanted to know “why” Grandma did it. When we asked her grandmother, she roared with laughter and then replied, “Well, I haven’t a clue as to why you do; I never had a pan large enough for the whole ham so I had to cut off the ends.” While this story has nothing to do with fear, it points out that we fail to seek out the “why’s” of what we do and then decide if those reasons have validity in our world and if they are enriching our lives.

How many of us still operate by obsolete rules that were learned from parents, teachers, and/or society?

A Love Letter – Senior Living

January 6, 2009

A LOVE LETTER

 

By Ruby MacDonald – Senior Living Insights

Hello. How are you?

 

I just had to send you this letter to tell you how much I love you and care about you. I saw you yesterday as you were walking with your friends. I waited all day, hoping you would walk and talk with me also. As evening drew near, I gave you a sunset to close your day, and a cool breeze to rest you. Then I waited, but you never came. O yes, it hurt me, but I still love you because I am your friend.

 

I saw you fall asleep last night, and I longed to touch your brow, so I spilled moonlight upon your pillow and your face…Again, I waited, wanting to rush down so we could talk. I have so many gifts for you.

 

You awakened late this morning and rushed off for the day. My tears were in the rain. Today you looked so sad, so alone. It makes my heart ache because I understand. My friends let me down and hurt me many times, but I love you. I try to tell you in the quiet green grass. I whisper it in the leaves and trees, and breathe it in the color of the flowers. I shout it to you in the mountain streams, and give the birds love songs to sing. I clothe you with warm sunshine and perfume the air. My love for you is deeper than the oceans and bigger than the biggest want or need you could ever have.

 

We will spend eternity together in heaven. I know how hard it is on earth. I really know, because I was there, and I want to help you. My Father wants to help you, too. He’s that way, you know. Just call me, ask me, talk to me. It is your decision . . .

 

 I have chosen you, and because of this I will wait  . . . 

Because I love you.

 

Your friend, ___________________(please insert the deity of your choice)

 

This writing by Harry D. Cup of Orland, Fl., was found in the Bible of Tom MacDonald’s mother, Carolyn, who some of you may remember when she lived at Chateau I.

THAT NASTY FOUR LETTER WORD – Senior Living Insights

January 3, 2009

THAT NASTY FOUR LETTER WORD

 

Yes, I’m writing about the “F” word.

This “F” word is – F-E-A-R, one of the most crippling of the four letter words. We all have some. FEAR directs our lives with enough strength and power to keep us confined within the steel cell of our minds. A prisoner of “fear.”  If you doubt it, take time to honestly examine your own fears to see how they have kept you in bondage. How have they denied you some of the joys of life? What have you always wanted to do but didn’t because of fear?

Some of us have worked hard to remove one steel bar at a time. Others tend to be content within their prisons. Few if any of us live within the freedoms that are ours simply for the taking.   The unfortunate thing about fear is that not only does it deny us the freedom to live; it is consciously or unconsciously passed on from one generation to the next.

My own mother had far too many fears that she passed on to her four daughters. She was fearful of the water and didn’t want us to drown. She was fearful of bikes and skates, so we were “saved” from falling down and bruising ourselves. The dark. What people would say if….And the list could go on and on.

As many of you know, Tom and I spend as much time on the water as possible. Vacation destinations are mostly to the ocean. And boating is a top priority. But I don’t know how to swim so I play it safe and cautiously while others are in the warm tropical water snorkeling or swimming to cool off. The turning point for me was a recent incident where we were in a water taxi going from one small island to the main one. I usually wear a lifejacket, but our luggage had already been stacked forward and the lifejackets were all beyond reach in the nose of the bow. After our group of six boarded, several islanders came aboard making far too many people for such a narrow wooden boat. The half hour ride was riddled with fear as each of us knew that it would not take much to tip the boat. I realized then how unfair it was that I could not swim and others would have the responsibility of saving me, in addition to themselves, if we’d capsized. The only way to conquer fear is to face it, and so I’m taking swim lessons. And so, “You can teach an old dog new tricks!”  So don’t you dare use “age” as an excuse.

My fellow-writer, Marion Duckworth said, “Isn’t it interesting that you are doing so well so quickly and fear kept you from learning to swim. A message for all of us.”

            The point is, that for many of us, life is quickly fleeting by and we are missing out on living life to the fullest because of our fears. Now, while the clock still clicks, it is a good time to do something that your fears have stolen from you..  The four letter word can be turned into a five letter word: FAITH in yourself and your ability to CHANGE. One of the best ways to initiate a change is to state what your intention is for that fear. Intention is just another way of saying that we can create what we think about. Our first thought becomes an “intention” about a specific fear, emotion or attitude.

In a new movie, “What the Bleep! Do We Know!?,  which is sweeping the country,  Dr. Joe Dispenza says, “I wake up in the morning, and I consciously create my day the way I want it to happen. Now, sometimes, because my mind is examining all the things that I need to get done, it takes me a little bit to settle down, and get to the point of where I’m actually intentionally creating my day. But here’s the thing. When I create my day, … out of nowhere, little things happen that are so unexplainable; I know they are the process or the result of my creation. And the more I do that, the more I build a neural net in my brain, (and I can) accept that that’s possible. It gives me the power and the incentive to do it…”   (This amazing movie will be shown in Walnut Creek on August 13, 04.)

I’ve written about the power of intention before but it is so powerful and I’m so excited about the possibilities that you’ll just have to bear with me because I really want you to get the concept. It’s so simple that it would be easy to think it doesn’t matter. But it does. Here is how to make it work for you:

·         Break your day into segment. A segment begins the moment you wake up and have a first thought.

·         Now direct that thought into an intention. Send out the thought of what kind of day you’d like to have. Perhaps you felt grumpy, or not as well as you’d like to feel. The thought you’d send out is for health and joy and you would concentrate on those.

·         The next thing you do becomes a segment, and so on all through the day. Before you begin each segment, direct your thoughts towards a positive, joyful outcome.

·         Now you are in control of your thoughts, your day, and your life. You will feel more in control instead of out of control.

·         Believe!  (FAITH REPLACES FEAR)

Had Tom and I and our group taken control of the segment before we stepped into that island boat in Tonga, directing it to safety, we would have spoken to the captain about the vessel being overloaded and asked the islanders to wait for the next boat taxi since we had a plane to catch that morning and needed to get to shore. And we would have made sure that we had easy access to the life jackets and I would have been wearing one. In other words, having a clear intention as we go through the day, assures us less stress and gives us more of what we really want.  It gives us control over our fears and allows us to create a positive outcome.  So—NEVER AGAIN AVOID THE FOUR LETTER WORD, “FEAR.”

 

 

 

How To HAve A Love Affair – Senior Living Insights

December 27, 2008

By Ruby MacDonald

Taking care of self is a natural outgrowth of self-love. Have a quiet love affair with yourself. – Dr. Wayne Dyer.

 

 

It’s that time of year again; let’s welcome December with gratitude for all the blessings that surround us. Every holiday season it has been my tradition to suggest that you give yourself a Christmas gift. That gift is to love yourself more. Self-love covers the oceans of your life and its effect excludes nothing in your own private world. It is priceless–yet costs nothing–except a decision. Our circumstances and age are not barriers. The only barrier is our own resistance.

 

There are many reasons why we don’t love ourselves properly. One is guilt from our past. We carry it around as though it were something to cherish; we talk about it, we think about it, and we put ourselves down for past mistakes. We can forgive others but not ourselves. We’ve all made mistakes; mistakes happen so that we can learn from them. They are not failures–they are simply tools for learning. They are forgivable. This season, forgive. Then the first beautiful gift you can unwrap for yourself is FORGIVENESS. Forgive yourself right now for everything that bothers you. Picture yourself as a beautiful new baby who has just entered the world with a life free of guilt and free of self-blame. LOVE YOURSELF. GOD LOVES YOU JUST AS YOU ARE.

 

The next gift to claim is a new way to look at illness and health. Dr. Wayne Dyer says that when you are told that you have a physical affliction you can either prepare to suffer or prepare to heal. Unfortunately, most of us open up our arms and receive the news as though it were what we’d been hoping for. After all, it does give us something new to talk and complain about. Dinner-table-talk. In addition, we usually take complete ownership of the diagnosis and immediately refer to it as “my” arthritis, or “my” heart condition, or “my cancer,” and we hold on like it is a precious gem. Then we worry about it developing into a worse condition, completely forgetting that, “We become what we think about all day long.”  We all know people who have been diagnosed with cancer and given a short time to live. And they live short. We also know of people who lived with cancer for years because they didn’t know they had an illness and were never given that life-sentence.

 

Many doctors don’t help us to think positively. Some love to tell us that arthritis will set in after a sprain, fall or break. They simply can’t say you’ve broken your arm and it will heal. No. Arthritis will set in. On a trip to Kauai sometime ago, I slipped on a slimy rock while exploring the beach and injured my wrist badly. I was told that I’d be getting arthritis.  If I had believed that, I’d have arthritis for certain.  When a doctor tells me that, I just look him in the eye and say, “Doc, I refuse to have arthritis.” They don’t hear comments like that very often and that renders them speechless–for a moment or two. My purpose certainly is not to put-down doctors, but rather to have you change the way you think about illness. When a medical expert tells us that we have a ”dis-ease,” the word means that our body is not at ease. It’s a warning. You can help put the “ease” or harmony back by focusing on the positives and believing that you possess the power/attitude to help heal yourself and that there is a spiritual solution to every problem.  You are never alone.

 

These are the easy steps to take: 1) Take control of your life.  Do not accept an illness with open arms;. 2) Refuse to give the illness permission to stay in your body. 3) Visualize your body as whole, as perfectly healthy. 4) Tell yourself several times a day that you have a healthy body. 5) Give gratitude for that body. 6) Do not think about or focus on the illness, 7) Do not talk about it, Do not reinforce it in any way. 9) Continue to follow your doctor’s orders and treat your illness as prescribed knowing that your body is healing. 10) Remember, thoughts are powerful. If you think you will not get well, you won’t. If you think you’ll heal, you will.

 

The best gift you can give yourself is a Love Affair. Make the decision to have a love affair with yourself, and then really fall in love with that magnificent spirit that lives inside your body.

 

May your cup of blessings truly runneth over.

Senior Living Insights

AGELESS – REALITY OR MYTH? Senior Living Insights

December 20, 2008

AGELESS – REALITY OR MYTH? Senior Living Insights

 

By Ruby MacDonald

 

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. – unknown

 

For the last few decades I’ve been teaching people how to think in a way that keeps them feeling ageless. And now, suddenly my friends and I have all become seniors. And that’s a good thing! Being a senior demands that we learn to flow with the tide or we shall drown in the sea of life. Some of my friends who are not yet seniors are also struggling in the waters of change as an only child, or children, swim away from the warm sands of home to find their new adventures. Then the parents must learn to walk the beach alone. My older friends experience the death of a loved one, divorce, illness, moving to a new community to be near adult children, and the list of changes we must face are endless. We’ve always gone through changes at every age but somehow in these golden years, the waters we wade in seem deeper.

 

Most of the major changes create high stress levels. However, change is the name of the game of life. Whether we can adjust to the many changes is what determines whether or not we will become “aged” or “ageless.” Given the choice, becoming and staying AGELESS is the ideal goal. Too many of us seem to reach a certain age and then never again venture into the oceans of life. Yet the ocean still beacons to us to jump in and swim.

 

Of course, circumstances change over the years and our health may in reality slow us down or even stop us from being as active as we once were. However, what we do with our attitude about any circumstance is totally up to each of us. Fortunately there are many who never see any limitations to living a full life. One of my favorite people who exhibited strength and courage was Christopher Reeves who not only fought to live life as fully as he could, but also helped others while doing so. He could have given up, felt sorry for himself and created misery for all those who loved him, but he displayed courage and determination instead.

 

Helen Keller, being both blind and deaf had more to overcome than most of us, but she said that, “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” She didn’t include an age limit in her statement, and we should not set age limits to our quest for adventure. She knew that her character would be formed and strengthened by surmounting the difficulties she faced.

 

WE ARE THE MASTER, EVEN IN OUR WEAKEST AND MOST ABANDONED STATE – James Allen

 

There are so many advantages to being a senior. Yet we seldom hear the positive side. Let me name a few. By this time we don’t care anymore what people say or think about us. We’ve earned the right to be us and we don’t have to meet the expectations of others. We can simply relax and be. We don’t have to “do” unless we want to. As someone wisely said, we are not human do-ings, we are “human be-ings.” But we often forget to take the time to simply BE. Seniors have more time to BE.

 

Another advantage of being an AGELESS Senior is that we can “BE” an inspiration to others. We can help drown the old myth that being a senior is the end of life and that we can’t keep doing many of the enjoyable things we’ve always done. The only thing that stops us is fear and an attitude that shouts that we can’t or shouldn’t at “our age.” To become or stay AGELESS, you’ve got to want it – you’ve got to have the passion – if you are to change. 

 

Lasting changes need a strong foundation on which to thrive. Just as the oceans rest on firm bed- rock, our strength comes from being firmly centered in a Higher Power. To become or remain  AGELESS in today’s world requires a vigilant guard against the myths of aging that surround and nag at us.  In the end, it’s up to each one of us to decide whether we will be “aged” and let the last precious years of life slip by, or be AGELESS, ignore the number of years of we’ve lived, and find new adventures to pursue so that life is exciting and stimulating. The choice is ours. January first is an excellent time to commit to an AGELESS ATTITUDE, renewing that commitment every single morning. What would you like to be doing right now that you’ve allowed your age and attitude to stop you?

 

“HOLD FAST TO an ageless attitude FOR IF the spirit dies, LIFE is nothing more than a boat at sea that cannot navigate the oceans of life; it is at the mercy of the wind and waves.” – Ruby MacDonald

 

Senior Living Insights

Getting Older – Senior Living Insights

December 13, 2008

GETTING OLDER – Senior Living Insights

By Ruby MacDonald

“I began to understand that the promises of the world are for the most part vain phantoms, and that to have faith in one self and become something of worth and value is the best and safest course.” – Michelangelo

The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback; I don’t think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, the woman was immediately embarrassed. I then explained that it was an interesting question and I would ponder it.

Old age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body, of course! The wrinkles, the baggy eyes, skin spots and bumps, the sagging butt, and – - -. Often I am taken aback by that old person who lives in my mirror, but I don’t agonize over those things for very long. This is God’s plan for us.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, and my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I’ve aged, I’ve become kinder to myself and less critical of myself. I’ve finally become my own friend and I like her.

I don’t chide myself for eating that extra cookie or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly trinket. I am entitled to overeat, to be messy and to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. I dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50’s and if at the same time wish to weep over a lost love, I will.

I will walk the beach in a swimsuit that is stretched over a bulging body and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to despite the pitying glances from the bikini set. Oh yes, they too, will eventually look like me.

I know I am often forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. Eventually I remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one or when a child suffers or even when a beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turn gray and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

Most importantly, I think that by living this many years, I have finally begun to understand a bit about why we are all here; why we were gifted to walk the pathways we have trod and maybe glimpse a bit of God’s plan for now and later. I have been truly blessed.

So, to answer the question: I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been or worrying about what will be. And -I shall eat a bit of the “dessert of life” every single day! (Author unknown – an email forward 5-05)

***

I’d like to thank the person who wrote this article because she has fed us some challenging food for thought. Today let’s all rethink our own attitudes about aging and if they are less than positive, turn those thoughts around so that each and every day that God gives us will be a precious gift for which we truly give thanks and receive with gratitude each and every morning as we awaken.

PEOPLE DON’T GROW OLD.

WHEN THEY STOP GROWING, THEY BECOME OLD. – (Anonymous)

“You gotta live every day like it’s your last because one day you’ll be right.” – Senior Living Insights

December 6, 2008

“You gotta live every day like it’s your last because one day you’ll be right.” Frank Sinatra

Senior Living Insights

 

By: Ruby MacDonald

 

While Tom and I, Tim and Suz and friends were moored off the New Zealand coast one evening, listening to my all time favorite, Frank Sinatra singing many of his popular hits, we made a point of listening carefully to the lyrics. We found that they contained some pretty wonderful messages for our lives that triggered a lively discussion. Ole Blue Eyes may be gone but his spirit certainly is alive in our daily lives through his music.  As you read these words, think about them and what they either do or can mean to you personally.

 

IF YOU’RE YOUNG AT HEART

Fairy tales can come true

It can happen to you

If you’re young at heart

For its hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind

If you’re young at heart

 

You can go to extremes with impossible schemes

You can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams

And life gets more exciting with each passing day

And love is either in your heart or on its way

 

Don’t you know that it’s worth every treasure on earth

To be young at heart

For as rich as you are its much better by far

To be young at heart

 

And if you should survive to 105

Look at all you’ll derive out of being alive

Then here is the best part

You have a head start

If you are among the very young at heart. – (Music:Joseph Myrow, Lyrics: Mack Gordon 1946)

 

We asked everyone aboard what they thought it meant to be “young at heart” and thus this month’s column was born.

 

First of all, let’s begin by discussing what it means when we don’t stay young at heart:  All too often we focus on the number of years we’ve lived and give the number permission to dominate our lives, either by mimicking aging role models, or living by preconceived ideas about aging that society has handed to us.  It’s easy to forget that times change and today we are far younger than our parents were in their aging years.  If we do focus on the number of years we’ve lived, too often we use our age as an excuse to get stuck in one time zone and live in the past. Or we think we’re much too old to do certain things such as dressing more youthfully, trying a new hair style and since we’re simply afraid to try new things, we limit/deprive ourselves of being young at heart. We stop dreaming. We get stuck. Fairy tales fade away.

 

“For its hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind, If you’re young at heart”

 

On the other hand, those who remain young at heart seldom use their age as an excuse. If anything, they use their age as a springboard because they know it’s now or never and they’d better get with the program if they’re going to have fairy tales come true. They live each day to the fullest—as though it’s the last, as ole Blue Eyes said.

 

Those who are young at heart are not afraid to risk doing something new and different, whether it is a new card game, traveling to an unfamiliar place, or ordering something new on the menu. Or perhaps it’s a new trendy hairstyle, or daring to have our hair colored (men and women), or wearing a bright new color that makes us look alive and ready to explore life.

 

To be young at heart is to be limitless – that is, there are no limits set, no boundaries to which you will not cross because of fear, or risk, or age.

 

The young at heart feel ageless. They don’t look in the mirror and concentrate on the road map that has planted itself on their faces. They are proud of their wrinkles, knowing they’ve worked darned hard to earn them. Instead they look in the mirror and see a face that has sparkling eyes, smile lines, and a mind filled with positive attitudes that nourish a sense of enduring adventure. They still buy green bananas.

 

The young at heart are timeless. They don’t make plans according to the number of years they’ve lived. Their time-line is open. They can bend. They are open-ended to new ideas as the times change, and know that change is what life on this planet is all about.

 

The young at heart aren’t afraid to dream. They set realistic goals and watch them come true, one at a time. They know that they must have something to look forward to each day, something that is filled with hope for tomorrow. It may be as small as knitting a scarf for someone, or as large as taking a trip to a place they’ve always wanted to see on the other side of the world, or in the next town, or in the garden. There are no size restrictions to dreams and we can have any kind and as many as we want. So what are you waiting for?

 

Fairy tales can come true. It can happen to you – if you’re young at heart.

 

 

Senior Living Insight by Ruby MacDonald 

 

 

 

WHERE THERE IS DESPAIR LET THERE BE HOPE – Senior Living Insight

December 4, 2008

Senior Living Insight – WHERE THERE IS DESPAIR LET THERE BE HOPE  St Francis/Assisi    

 

By Ruby MacDonald

Several times I have related that a thought is the first step in creating both the healthy and unhealthy emotions we live with. It takes but a simple persistent negative thought to lead to despair. Dr. Wayne Dyer, author of There’s a Spiritual Solution to Every Problem, says, “Despair is an attitude, experienced in the mind. It is a way of looking at a life situation and feeling hopeless.” He adds that there actually is no despair in the world. You cannot bring home a bucket full of despair; there are only people thinking despairing thoughts. “Despair itself is a mental process that sizes up and views a situation as awful,” says Dr. Dyer. Once we see despair as a mental attitude, we can remedy it by beginning the process of bringing the hope that will dissolve the attitude of suffering. Hope is also a thought. Hope is a vision. Despair is darkness. Hope is light. Hope is on the higher end of the energy scale that brings health and happiness; despair and gloom is on the lower end of the energy scale that makes us vulnerable to illness and depression. It clouds our thinking. We cannot see in the darkness.

 

In order to cope with despair, we must learn to stand back and in affect, detach ourselves from what is happening, or take on the attitude of the observer so that you can “look in and see the despair” as though you are another person seeing you. This detachment gives us the power to change our thought pattern to create hope and a higher level of energy. The higher the level of energy we can create, the easier it is to find the spiritual solution to our problems since God is peace, hope and love.

 

As we grow older, often the optimism we held about life turns to despair for many reasons. Loneliness, illness, grief, and more, can overwhelm us.   Gloom and despair may come from our attachment to the feelings that life is unfair, or we blame others for our sorrows, or we feel we are not understood. These equate to self-pity and self-loathing. “Despair allows the sufferer to suffer in comfort”, says Dr. Dyer. Often we despair over what or who is missing in our lives. We have been conditioned to think, “I am what I have, what I do, and what others think of me.” Yet if we listen, God’s voice will whisper that none of these things bring happiness. If we listen we may even hear Him say, “I am your only source of peace. I am the spiritual solution to all your problems related to attachments.”

     To bring light to darkness, practice doing the following every day: 1) Refuse to dwell on thoughts about the problems in your life but rather on all there is to be grateful for even if it is one tiny thing. In time your list of blessings will become more evident. 2) Practice being an appreciator of beauty; strive to see the beauty in everyone and everything. 3) Read about those who have overcome darkness in their lives such as Helen Keller & Christopher Reeves.  4) Send out thoughts of love to those around you and immediately replace thoughts of resentment/disturbance/criticalness, with love. 5) Keep your thoughts centered on light and what you want, rather than on dark and what you don’t want; visualize your body as well and whole, do not reinforce any illness by thinking about it or discussing it habitually.  6) Go outside into the day light when thoughts of darkness overtake you since light dissolves darkness. 7) Practice purification by drinking pure water, eating pure foods, and keeping your thoughts pure. 8) Repeat to yourself daily the following:

AS I THINK SO SHALL I BE

 Senior Living Insights by Ruby MacDonald

 

 

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