Assisted Living San Francisco Bay Area, Ca

March 7, 2009

The Chateau of Pleasant Hill, California is a senior living community that offers assisted living, Alzheimer’s care, dementia care, home care and a whole host of senior care services.

Ruby MacDonald writes a monthly column in the Senior Insights Newsletter and it has become a favorite amongst the elderly residents who say that Ruby’s positive words and inspirations make them feel wonderful.

Ruby’s word for the day:

EMPOWERED LIVING   by  Ruby MacDonald                                                     

HOW WELL ARE YOU . . .   HEARING ?                                                                                          

Empowered living includes the use of our very important five senses. “Hearing” is one of those senses. It’s one fifth. For those who cannot hear, one-fifth of their senses are impaired.
I do not take hearing for granted because my hearing became impaired around midlife. I speak from experience when I say that not being able to hear easily causes many problems and changes in lifestyle. For instance, do you hesitate answering the phone? Or do you only use the phone when it’s an absolute necessity? Has your social life receded and slowly turned you into an introvert? Do you stay away from social gatherings because you can’t hear in a crowd?

Rush Limbaugh, the nationally syndicated radio talk show host, experienced a rapid loss of hearing and within three months he was deaf in one ear and had an 80% loss in the other. He could no longer understand radio, TV, or the voices of call-in listeners. He has a severe bi-laterial sensorineural hearing loss due to an autoimmune inner ear disease. AIED causes less than 1% of all cases of sensorineural hearing loss; most cases are due to aging, noise exposure, or inherited hearing loss and develop very gradually. Most patients respond to early treatment of steroids and benefit from the use of hearing aids; some need cochlear implants.

Today there is little or no excuse for anyone to be hearing impaired even though statistics show that most people with  hearing loss do nothing about it! A healthy, positive approach is to take charge of your hearing healthcare and find a way to hear as well as possible again. Nothing can be done until you admit you have a hearing loss.

Which type are you?  Do you consider your hearing “good enough” to get by on?”  It doesn’t matter that you force everyone to repeat nearly everything they say? Or, do you want to hear as well as possible?  I hope you cherish the latter and want to enjoy hearing to the fullest.

Here are a few empowering secrets to hearing: Wear hearing aids in one or both ears. Lipreading is helpful as a third hearing aid. There are telephone and TV amplifiers. Ask people to look at you and speak more slowly. In a group, always sit by a wall to block sounds.

Find a good audiologist, one recommended by a friend rather than selected at random from the phone book. They will evaluate your hearing and hearing needs

Words Are The Most Powerful Thing In The Universe! – Senior Living Insights

February 21, 2009

Words are the most powerful thing in the universe.

Senior Living Insights By Ruby MacDonald
WORDS ARE POWERFUL. How we use them is most important. Positive words are powerful enough to bring healing. Negative words have the power to kill our spirit as illustrated in a newspaper article which clearly demonstrates how powerful and healing just a few simple words can be. After you’ve read this column perhaps, you’ll be moved to say some healing words to someone who waits, hoping to hear them.

Maybe you read the article in the Contra Costa Times on July 3, 2002; the headlines read: WOMAN RELIEVED TO HEAR SON’S KILLER APOLOGIZE. There was also a photo of Liz Kiepert—smiling!

You may remember back to 1998 when  an 11-year-old boy shot and killed Larry Kiepert, a 13 year old neighbor boy who was playing basketball in his own yard.  The eleven year old served four years for voluntary manslaughter.. This week when he attended his parole hearing, so did Liz Kiepert, the mother of the boy who was killed.

According to the news article written by Contra Costa Times Staff Writer, Celeste Ward,  Liz Kiepert  had suffered depression, anxiety, panic attacks and post-traumatic stress disorder after she watched her son be shot to death. She had said she wished the boy would have to serve the entire 14-year sentence and she did not understand how he could be rehabilitated when her family was still torn apart.

As the hearing date approached, Liz Kiepert wasn’t sure she wanted to be there. Two doctors had advised her against it but she needed to be there to vindicate her son. She went alone.  What occurred at the hearing is the best thing that could have happened, short of bringing her son back to life.

Moments before his release, the now 15 year-old boy had something to say. Liz says, “He turned around to face me and at first was mumbling. He said, ‘Mrs. Kiepert, if there was anything I could do differently, I would. I wish I could bring Larry back.’ Then he started to cry, and I asked the judge if I could hug him. That came out of my heart. When I saw him crying, I thought, ‘He’s a child.’ I hugged him 10 to 20 seconds and he kept whispering in my ear, ‘I’m so sorry.’  I told him Larry would forgive him, and to go make a good life for himself. I had the whole courtroom in tears.”

Liz Kiepert felt the years of bitterness and anger melt away as the judge released the boy. She said, “It was a relief. He said what I wanted to hear all these years. I felt like a weight was taken off my shoulders. Now I can go forward.” Liz Kiepert has returned to work after a long absence. A photo accompanying the newspaper article showed Liz smiling. Her family and friends said they noticed a difference in her in that the anguished look she had carried was gone. Finally, the weight had been lifted.

The weight of holding resentment and not being able to forgive is perhaps one of the most destructive emotions we can cling to. Even when we feel it is justified, the end result is the damage it does to our bodies and minds. We always have a choice, just as Liz Kiepert had. She chose to forgive and free both herself and the young man who still has a life to live.

WORDS. Just a few simple but meaningful words have put a smile back on Liz’s face and life back into her spirit.  As you’ve seen, words are powerful.

What Are You Creating Right Now? – Assisted Living Insights

January 31, 2009

WHAT ARE YOU CREATING RIGHT NOW?

“You create your thoughts, your thoughts create your intentions, and your intentions create your reality.”
Dr. Wayne Dyer

By Ruby MacDonald

For years I’ve been fascination by the human brain and its vast potential. First from a psychological v.p. & now from a spiritual view point, not in the religious sense, but in the more mystical/creative realm. I’m convinced that our ability to create begins in our brain; God created us to create. Creation begins with one tiny thought. It may come from within you, or someone else, and once you accept it as yours and begin to think about it, you’ve started the process of creation. The more emotion you have with that thought the more powerful is your ability to attract what you want. Once your brain gets the go-ahead from you, it springs into action and clicks in to perform your command perfectly. That is why it’s extremely important to be aware of your own thoughts and the words you say. Your brain doesn’t sort out positive from the negative; it waits for your command. It simply acts on your thought.
I’ve spent half of my life learning about and teaching how powerful the brain is and how important our thoughts are. When I was a kid I used to hear my father speak of the dreaded “evil eye” in his native Sicily. I snickered and thought it was a bunch of nonsense even though the stories made the hair on the back of my neck stand at attention. I’ve since learned about the power of the mind and believe that if I told you that something terrible was going to happen to you, and you believed me, YOU could make it happen simply by the power/energy/focus you give it; your own mind would work to carry out whatever you feared.
I believe that the power of the mind can also make us ill, or worse. One of my favorite examples of the power of suggestion is this one: During the winter months we are ambushed with news that the flu is epidemic. We’re sure we can’t escape it so we begin to worry. If we get the sniffles we’re certain we’ve got something that’s going around. We reinforce our fear by thinking that we have a cold, and we tell everyone who will listen. (It may have only been hay fever.) Next, we think we will be really sick, probably run a fever and by the end of the week we are certain we will be in bed vomiting or worse. Well, guess what? I believe that since we’ve programmed ourselves for a week full of illness— that is exactly what we will get. We’ve created it with our powerful minds. The brain has taken instructions and followed them exactly as we’ve prescribed it.
Arthritis is one of my pet peeves. If we break or sprain something doctors are quick to say arthritis will set in. My doc knows “I don’t do arthritis.” She snickers. I refer to it as the nasty “A” word. People take possession of arthritis as soon as they think they have it. I.E.: A younger friend’s fingers began aching; her mother had arthritis so she was certain she’d inherited it. (How many of us do that?) She took possession of it and referred to it as “my arthritis.” We had a little discussion and it “amazingly” disappeared! I believe strongly that it isn’t necessary to talk about any symptom or medical sentence your doctor has decreed for you. To acknowledge it is to reinforce it. Taking possession of it and making it yours only gives it permission to proceed. Once we start talking about it to others, it grabs that energy/power to accelerate. That energy can better be used to create positive thoughts of healing for yourself. Get the needed treatment. Then if you must tell someone, say, “I’m catching healing,” and let it go. You can tell those symptoms that they are not welcome in your body and to flee. You must believe it, however, and you must be persistent, for the habit of illness is like a child who pushes the envelope to see if you mean business.. It’s up to you to stick in there and show the old habit who is boss. It takes a while to break old habits and patterns, so don’t expect the symptoms to disappear quickly. Like a spoiled child who is suddenly being disciplined, there will be rebellion within. Remember to put lots of emotion behind your thoughts of healing and be persistent.
We are never too old or too sick or too busy, to have creative minds. We “create” every second of every day and it is either negative or positive —depleting energy or increasing energy.
We deplete our energy if we focus on a negative situation, be it our own or someone else’s. Our energy level plummets and a cloud of doom and gloom cloaks us. When we change our thought pattern to those that are sunny, energy levels are elevated to a healthier state; we are less vulnerable to illness & to attracting negative thinking people into our lives.. Thoughts are contagious. Choose wisely.

“As you cannot have a sweet and wholesome abode unless you admit the air and sunshine freely into your rooms, so a strong body and a bright, happy, or serene countenance can only result from the free admittance into the mind of thoughts of joy and goodwill and serenity.” — James Allen 1864-1912 (note the dates—this is not “new age” enlightenment, but time-proven.)

The Parable of the Trapeze – Senior Living Insights

January 21, 2009

Turning the Fear of Transformation into the Transformation of Fear
by Danaan Parry

Sometimes I feel that my life is a series of trapeze swings. I’m either
hanging on to a trapeze bar swinging along or, for a few moments in my
life, I’m hurtling across space in between trapeze bars.

Most of the time, I spend my life hanging on for dear life to my
trapeze-bar-of-the-moment. It carries me along at a certain steady rate of
swing and I have the feeling that I’m in control of my life.

I know most of the right questions and even some of the answers.

But every once in a while as I’m merrily (or even not-so-merrily) swinging
along, I look out ahead of me into the distance and what do I see? I see
another trapeze bar swinging toward me. It’s empty and I know, in that
place in me that knows, that this new trapeze bar has my name on it. It is
my next step, my growth, my aliveness coming to get me. In my heart of
hearts I know that, for me to grow, I must release my grip on this
present, well-known bar and move to the new one.

Each time it happens to me I hope (no, I pray) that I won’t have to let go
of my old bar completely before I grab the new one. But in my knowing
place, I know that I must totally release my grasp on my old bar and, for
some moment in time, I must hurtle across space before I can grab onto the
new bar.

Each time, I am filled with terror. It doesn’t matter that in all my
previous hurtles across the void of unknowing I have always made it. I am
each time afraid that I will miss, that I will be crushed on unseen rocks
in the bottomless chasm between bars. I do it anyway. Perhaps this is the
essence of what the mystics call the faith experience. No guarantees, no
net, no insurance policy, but you do it anyway because somehow to keep
hanging on to that old bar is no longer on the list of alternatives. So,
for an eternity that can last a microsecond or a thousand lifetimes, I
soar across the dark void of “the past is gone, the future is not yet
here.”

It’s called “transition.” I have come to believe that this transition is
the only place that real change occurs. I mean real change, not the
pseudo-change that only lasts until the next time my old buttons get
punched.

I have noticed that, in our culture, this transition zone is looked upon
as a “no-thing,” a noplace between places. Sure, the old trapeze bar was
real, and that new one coming towards me, I hope that’s real, too. But the
void in between? Is that just a scary, confusing, disorienting nowhere
that must be gotten through as fast and as unconsciously as possible?

NO! What a wasted opportunity that would be. I have a sneaking suspicion
that the transition zone is the only real thing and the bars are illusions
we dream up to avoid the void where the real change, the real growth,
occurs for us. Whether or not my hunch is true, it remains that the
transition zones in our lives are incredibly rich places. They should be
honored, even savored. Yes, with all the pain and fear and feelings of
being out of control that can (but not necessarily) accompany transitions,
they are still the most alive, most growth-filled, passionate, expansive
moments in our lives.

We cannot discover new oceans unless we have the courage to lose
sight of the shore. Anonymous

So, transformation of fear may have nothing to do with making fear go
away, but rather with giving ourselves permission to “hang out” in the
transition between trapezes. Transforming our need to grab that new bar,
any bar, is allowing ourselves to dwell in the only place where change
really happens. It can be terrifying. It can also be enlightening in the
true sense of the word. Hurtling through the void, we just may learn how
to fly.

Hand Me Down Rules – Senior Living Insights

January 13, 2009

HAND ME DOWN RULES

Emotional rules inherited without protest

By Ruby MacDonald – Senior Living Insights

Sometimes adult children look forward to the time when they will receive an inheritance, if they are fortunate enough to have wealthy parents or relatives. However, each of us has already received an inheritance such as all of the good traits we’ve been taught unhealthy habits, emotional traits, and unhealthy ways of handling unpleasant events in our lives. Many of us have embraced some or all of the emotional rules that we inherited without even a whimper of a protest even though they do not serve us well.

Most of us have lived with hand-me-down rules all of our lives. Some of them were passed on ever so innocently, from our parents. Some are so deeply ingrained that we haven’t bothered to question their validity. I like to use the old story of the ham that you may have heard a dozen times but I’ll personalize it to make it more interesting. Years ago when one of my young daughters saw me cutting off the ends of the ham before I baked it, she wanted to know why I did that. My reply was because my mother had. But my young inquisitive child wanted to know “why” Grandma did it. When we asked her grandmother, she roared with laughter and then replied, “Well, I haven’t a clue as to why you do; I never had a pan large enough for the whole ham so I had to cut off the ends.” While this story has nothing to do with fear, it points out that we fail to seek out the “why’s” of what we do and then decide if those reasons have validity in our world and if they are enriching our lives.

How many of us still operate by obsolete rules that were learned from parents, teachers, and/or society?

A Love Letter – Senior Living

January 6, 2009

A LOVE LETTER

 

By Ruby MacDonald – Senior Living Insights

Hello. How are you?

 

I just had to send you this letter to tell you how much I love you and care about you. I saw you yesterday as you were walking with your friends. I waited all day, hoping you would walk and talk with me also. As evening drew near, I gave you a sunset to close your day, and a cool breeze to rest you. Then I waited, but you never came. O yes, it hurt me, but I still love you because I am your friend.

 

I saw you fall asleep last night, and I longed to touch your brow, so I spilled moonlight upon your pillow and your face…Again, I waited, wanting to rush down so we could talk. I have so many gifts for you.

 

You awakened late this morning and rushed off for the day. My tears were in the rain. Today you looked so sad, so alone. It makes my heart ache because I understand. My friends let me down and hurt me many times, but I love you. I try to tell you in the quiet green grass. I whisper it in the leaves and trees, and breathe it in the color of the flowers. I shout it to you in the mountain streams, and give the birds love songs to sing. I clothe you with warm sunshine and perfume the air. My love for you is deeper than the oceans and bigger than the biggest want or need you could ever have.

 

We will spend eternity together in heaven. I know how hard it is on earth. I really know, because I was there, and I want to help you. My Father wants to help you, too. He’s that way, you know. Just call me, ask me, talk to me. It is your decision . . .

 

 I have chosen you, and because of this I will wait  . . . 

Because I love you.

 

Your friend, ___________________(please insert the deity of your choice)

 

This writing by Harry D. Cup of Orland, Fl., was found in the Bible of Tom MacDonald’s mother, Carolyn, who some of you may remember when she lived at Chateau I.

THAT NASTY FOUR LETTER WORD – Senior Living Insights

January 3, 2009

THAT NASTY FOUR LETTER WORD

 

Yes, I’m writing about the “F” word.

This “F” word is – F-E-A-R, one of the most crippling of the four letter words. We all have some. FEAR directs our lives with enough strength and power to keep us confined within the steel cell of our minds. A prisoner of “fear.”  If you doubt it, take time to honestly examine your own fears to see how they have kept you in bondage. How have they denied you some of the joys of life? What have you always wanted to do but didn’t because of fear?

Some of us have worked hard to remove one steel bar at a time. Others tend to be content within their prisons. Few if any of us live within the freedoms that are ours simply for the taking.   The unfortunate thing about fear is that not only does it deny us the freedom to live; it is consciously or unconsciously passed on from one generation to the next.

My own mother had far too many fears that she passed on to her four daughters. She was fearful of the water and didn’t want us to drown. She was fearful of bikes and skates, so we were “saved” from falling down and bruising ourselves. The dark. What people would say if….And the list could go on and on.

As many of you know, Tom and I spend as much time on the water as possible. Vacation destinations are mostly to the ocean. And boating is a top priority. But I don’t know how to swim so I play it safe and cautiously while others are in the warm tropical water snorkeling or swimming to cool off. The turning point for me was a recent incident where we were in a water taxi going from one small island to the main one. I usually wear a lifejacket, but our luggage had already been stacked forward and the lifejackets were all beyond reach in the nose of the bow. After our group of six boarded, several islanders came aboard making far too many people for such a narrow wooden boat. The half hour ride was riddled with fear as each of us knew that it would not take much to tip the boat. I realized then how unfair it was that I could not swim and others would have the responsibility of saving me, in addition to themselves, if we’d capsized. The only way to conquer fear is to face it, and so I’m taking swim lessons. And so, “You can teach an old dog new tricks!”  So don’t you dare use “age” as an excuse.

My fellow-writer, Marion Duckworth said, “Isn’t it interesting that you are doing so well so quickly and fear kept you from learning to swim. A message for all of us.”

            The point is, that for many of us, life is quickly fleeting by and we are missing out on living life to the fullest because of our fears. Now, while the clock still clicks, it is a good time to do something that your fears have stolen from you..  The four letter word can be turned into a five letter word: FAITH in yourself and your ability to CHANGE. One of the best ways to initiate a change is to state what your intention is for that fear. Intention is just another way of saying that we can create what we think about. Our first thought becomes an “intention” about a specific fear, emotion or attitude.

In a new movie, “What the Bleep! Do We Know!?,  which is sweeping the country,  Dr. Joe Dispenza says, “I wake up in the morning, and I consciously create my day the way I want it to happen. Now, sometimes, because my mind is examining all the things that I need to get done, it takes me a little bit to settle down, and get to the point of where I’m actually intentionally creating my day. But here’s the thing. When I create my day, … out of nowhere, little things happen that are so unexplainable; I know they are the process or the result of my creation. And the more I do that, the more I build a neural net in my brain, (and I can) accept that that’s possible. It gives me the power and the incentive to do it…”   (This amazing movie will be shown in Walnut Creek on August 13, 04.)

I’ve written about the power of intention before but it is so powerful and I’m so excited about the possibilities that you’ll just have to bear with me because I really want you to get the concept. It’s so simple that it would be easy to think it doesn’t matter. But it does. Here is how to make it work for you:

·         Break your day into segment. A segment begins the moment you wake up and have a first thought.

·         Now direct that thought into an intention. Send out the thought of what kind of day you’d like to have. Perhaps you felt grumpy, or not as well as you’d like to feel. The thought you’d send out is for health and joy and you would concentrate on those.

·         The next thing you do becomes a segment, and so on all through the day. Before you begin each segment, direct your thoughts towards a positive, joyful outcome.

·         Now you are in control of your thoughts, your day, and your life. You will feel more in control instead of out of control.

·         Believe!  (FAITH REPLACES FEAR)

Had Tom and I and our group taken control of the segment before we stepped into that island boat in Tonga, directing it to safety, we would have spoken to the captain about the vessel being overloaded and asked the islanders to wait for the next boat taxi since we had a plane to catch that morning and needed to get to shore. And we would have made sure that we had easy access to the life jackets and I would have been wearing one. In other words, having a clear intention as we go through the day, assures us less stress and gives us more of what we really want.  It gives us control over our fears and allows us to create a positive outcome.  So—NEVER AGAIN AVOID THE FOUR LETTER WORD, “FEAR.”

 

 

 

“You gotta live every day like it’s your last because one day you’ll be right.” – Senior Living Insights

December 6, 2008

“You gotta live every day like it’s your last because one day you’ll be right.” Frank Sinatra

Senior Living Insights

 

By: Ruby MacDonald

 

While Tom and I, Tim and Suz and friends were moored off the New Zealand coast one evening, listening to my all time favorite, Frank Sinatra singing many of his popular hits, we made a point of listening carefully to the lyrics. We found that they contained some pretty wonderful messages for our lives that triggered a lively discussion. Ole Blue Eyes may be gone but his spirit certainly is alive in our daily lives through his music.  As you read these words, think about them and what they either do or can mean to you personally.

 

IF YOU’RE YOUNG AT HEART

Fairy tales can come true

It can happen to you

If you’re young at heart

For its hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind

If you’re young at heart

 

You can go to extremes with impossible schemes

You can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams

And life gets more exciting with each passing day

And love is either in your heart or on its way

 

Don’t you know that it’s worth every treasure on earth

To be young at heart

For as rich as you are its much better by far

To be young at heart

 

And if you should survive to 105

Look at all you’ll derive out of being alive

Then here is the best part

You have a head start

If you are among the very young at heart. – (Music:Joseph Myrow, Lyrics: Mack Gordon 1946)

 

We asked everyone aboard what they thought it meant to be “young at heart” and thus this month’s column was born.

 

First of all, let’s begin by discussing what it means when we don’t stay young at heart:  All too often we focus on the number of years we’ve lived and give the number permission to dominate our lives, either by mimicking aging role models, or living by preconceived ideas about aging that society has handed to us.  It’s easy to forget that times change and today we are far younger than our parents were in their aging years.  If we do focus on the number of years we’ve lived, too often we use our age as an excuse to get stuck in one time zone and live in the past. Or we think we’re much too old to do certain things such as dressing more youthfully, trying a new hair style and since we’re simply afraid to try new things, we limit/deprive ourselves of being young at heart. We stop dreaming. We get stuck. Fairy tales fade away.

 

“For its hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind, If you’re young at heart”

 

On the other hand, those who remain young at heart seldom use their age as an excuse. If anything, they use their age as a springboard because they know it’s now or never and they’d better get with the program if they’re going to have fairy tales come true. They live each day to the fullest—as though it’s the last, as ole Blue Eyes said.

 

Those who are young at heart are not afraid to risk doing something new and different, whether it is a new card game, traveling to an unfamiliar place, or ordering something new on the menu. Or perhaps it’s a new trendy hairstyle, or daring to have our hair colored (men and women), or wearing a bright new color that makes us look alive and ready to explore life.

 

To be young at heart is to be limitless – that is, there are no limits set, no boundaries to which you will not cross because of fear, or risk, or age.

 

The young at heart feel ageless. They don’t look in the mirror and concentrate on the road map that has planted itself on their faces. They are proud of their wrinkles, knowing they’ve worked darned hard to earn them. Instead they look in the mirror and see a face that has sparkling eyes, smile lines, and a mind filled with positive attitudes that nourish a sense of enduring adventure. They still buy green bananas.

 

The young at heart are timeless. They don’t make plans according to the number of years they’ve lived. Their time-line is open. They can bend. They are open-ended to new ideas as the times change, and know that change is what life on this planet is all about.

 

The young at heart aren’t afraid to dream. They set realistic goals and watch them come true, one at a time. They know that they must have something to look forward to each day, something that is filled with hope for tomorrow. It may be as small as knitting a scarf for someone, or as large as taking a trip to a place they’ve always wanted to see on the other side of the world, or in the next town, or in the garden. There are no size restrictions to dreams and we can have any kind and as many as we want. So what are you waiting for?

 

Fairy tales can come true. It can happen to you – if you’re young at heart.

 

 

Senior Living Insight by Ruby MacDonald 

 

 

 

SEAS THE DAY WITH GRATITUDE – Senior Living Insights

November 25, 2008

SEAS THE DAY WITH GRATITUDE    - Senior Living Insights                        

“A day without gratitude is like a day without sunshine.”

 

Today the sky is a lovely cobalt blue, a welcome change from the rains. Fluffy white clouds tease the sun. The horizon is a less vivid color as it dips down into the Coral Sea here on the north eastern coast of Australia. I’m sitting on the deck of a catamaran watching the dark blue waves that barely hint at white caps. We’re cruising along at ten knots and all is well.  Life is good. We utter a silent prayer of gratitude.

 

Gratitude! Such a powerful word. This word is a potent tool for life when we remember to focus on it. Oh, it’s easy to focus on gratitude on a perfect day such as this one when my mind is peaceful; I’m comfortable, healthy and well fed.

 

But what about those days when a persistent wind whips our sails or the seas are so choppy it’s difficult to find our sea legs – or the engines fail to fire up in the face of an approaching cyclone?

 

Even on land everyone has days like those. They seem to multiply as we grow into being more “seasoned adults.” But when we shift our focus from gratitude for all that’s right about our lives and focus on all that is not so right, often the sea of life becomes too rough to handle. It is then that thoughts of gratitude seem to have sunk to the bottom of the sea and the desire to be thankful for what fate has handed us is locked tight in Davey’s locker.

 

The sixty four dollar question then, is, “How can I focus on the positive things in my life when it feels as though I’ve drowned in my own problems?”  Changing our thought pattern is simple but not easy—since the way we think is a habit and habits are not easy to break. But the good news is that since thoughts are a habit, we can start a new habit—a new way of thinking. Use the methods outlined below, and stick with it for the entire month. These new habits will enrich your life and help develop an attitude of gratitude.

 

1. The first thought of negativity that sneaks into your mind must be speared as soon as possible so it doesn’t spread its tentacles like an octopus and render you helpless. A thought, (what you think ) is one of the most powerful, invisible, weapons (tools) in the world. Doubt me? Think about how Hitler’s powerful thoughts/words contaminated the world.  On the positive side, Dr. Norman Vincent Peale influenced thousands, perhaps millions of people including me, with his book, The Power of Positive Thinking. It all started with a thought. Dr. Wayne Dyer, a modern day motivational teacher of wisdom, says that we become what we think about all day long, and the Bible warned us to be careful what we ask for (it is a thought first). A thought alone is as powerful as asking for something with words. Think of it as a seed. As soon as energy is given to any thought it sprouts, and like a pesky weed, will spread its roots and grow.
2. Take charge of your thoughts and words. Remember, thoughts are powerful tools and you are in control of them. Many us allow our thoughts to sail through our minds with no controls. Yet we surely wouldn’t get into a boat that had no captain, engine (sails), no rudder, or wheel, and let the sea joust us about and be at the mercy of the seas Yet that is exactly what many of us do with our lives when we don’t control our thoughts.
3. Have your ammunition at hand. We must have constructive thoughts ready to push out and replace the first negative/destructive thoughts that enter.. Usually negative thoughts stir in the morning as soon as we wake up. Old habits have been lying beside us all night and they get up with us. It’s up to us to usher them out or invite them to stay. There are several kinds of ammunition that will replace those destructive thoughts while we break the old thought-patterns:
   1. Bible verses to read or saying those you have memorized
   2. Being in a state of gratitude first thing in the morning and before sleeping
   3. Prayers of affirmation and gratitude
   4. Reading inspirational magazines and books to keep your mind focused on the positive side of life.
   5. Listening to tapes, CDs of inspirational speakers
   6. Making a nightly list of at least five things for which you are grateful each day.
   7. Taking a quiet time each day to consciously focus on gratitude.
   8. Hanging out with positive people. “You gotta accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative,” to quote from an old song.

 

1. BE GRATEFUL.  No matter what the day brings, work at being grateful about the many things that are still good in your life.  Write “GRATITUDE” on your mirror or paper to constantly remind you until GRATITUDE becomes an automatic habit.

 

                              “Serving your mind a dose of gratitude is like a multivitamin for your body.”

 Senior Living Insights

EMPOWERED SENIOR LIVING

November 6, 2008

 “BECAUSE I CAN”  

By: Ruby MacDonald

Recently our daughter Shannon moved to this area from Bend, Oregon.  I watched as the movers unloaded all of their “treasures” from the large moving van into the house. I became fascinated with one of the movers as I watched him work. It was obvious he wasn’t a kid, but he was lean and muscular and worked harder than the eighteen year old mover. Curious, I asked the 75 year old man who was checking off the items if he knew the man’s age. He shook his head and then shouted over, “Hey, Jim, how old are ya’?”

“Eighty-two” Jim replied as he kept working.  My other daughter, Deb asked, “Why are you doing this kind of hard work?”  His reply was the stimulus for this article.  “BECAUSE I CAN,” Jim replied with pride, “Keeps me moving and healthy.”  He kept walking towards the van as he talked to us.

I know a lovely lady who is in her late 90’s who also lives that philosophy. She has created and still turns out beautiful raku pottery, lives in an upstairs condo and remains an independent woman.  BECAUSE I CAN!

Perhaps some of you remember the artist known as “Grandma Moses” who became famous for her country scenes and earned the title of “Grandma” because she was in her eighties when she began painting. BECAUSE I CAN!

On the dark side of aging, I once knew a perfectly healthy, strong woman, who at the age of 55, proclaimed herself “old” and took to her rocking chair. She rocked away each year of her life only to become a grouchy, lonely old woman who lived to be 101, and no one wanted to be around.  I am thankful that I knew this woman – for she has been my inspiration to remain youthful in my attitudes and lifestyle and to remember that AGE IS ONLY A NUMBER that tells us how long we have had the privilege of living and hopefully serving in some useful way.

Of course, the opposite of BECAUSE I CAN, is that old worn out phrase on which we frequently lean.”  I CAN’T.”  How often do we use that phrase as an excuse to grow older in place instead of exerting just a little more energy  to do something different, new, or a bit more difficult — BECAUSE YOU CAN!?

Here are some things to try this week: An exercise class – how about the new “ConDuctorcise” class everyone is talking about with great excitement?  When was the last time you made the effort to talk to someone you didn’t know and made a new friend?  How about helping a new resident to integrate into your community?  When was the last time you went on one of the many outings that are offered?  Or tried a new craft?  As I look over the monthly calendar I see enough activities to keep a person in the “I CAN” ATTITUDE for a lifetime.

Tonight before you retire, I’d like you to think about some of the things you have been telling yourself that you can’t do.  Now take a piece of paper and write a note to yourself and leave it where you will see it the first thing in the morning.  Write down at least one new thing that you will do to start or improve the ‘I CAN ATTITUDE.”  And have fun and be proud of yourself.